The emotional distrust shows the insecurity that a person feels toward another after previous disappointments. This mistrust is especially significant when it is not interpreted individually, but universally. For example, when a man comes to the conclusion that he does not trust any woman. This is a clear example that the problem is not in an external reason, but it is oneself who projects their mistrust in a subjective way. ” Why don’t I trust women? “This is the question asked by those who find themselves in a situation of these characteristics. In Psychology-Online we advise you to find the answer.
If you want to know why you don’t trust women, you have to bear in mind that, many times, it is nothing more than a defense mechanism. Whoever finds himself in this situation has experienced the fracture of the pain of the breaking of expectations placed on women who disappointed his confidence. The most important knowledge is that which is based on one’s own experience. For this reason, those who are unlucky enough to go through a similar situation of heartbreak or disappointment with different people may gradually lose their faith in love. There is no true love without trust.
The one who no longer trusts women has not reached this point, solely because of the experience of a lack of love. He has observed something else in the intentions of the people he has been with. For example, you may have realized that someone played with your illusions and at no point asked your forgiveness for it.
When a man no longer trusts women he has come to the conclusion of extracting general thoughts from individual actions. In other words, the idea that all people are equal has become absolute truth. This thesis has not been reached arbitrarily but rather by the common characteristics of stories lived with different people and at different times.
Lack of faith, in this type of circumstance, is the result of unresolved and overcome pain and suffering. It is a past pain that is still very present in memory. And, therefore, this yesterday interferes in a negative way in the presence of those who, when they meet someone interesting, tell themselves this negative message of mistrust.
If you distrust everyone, in this other article we help you to find out why you don’t trust anyone.
6 tips to regain confidence in women
Now that you know why you don’t trust women, then we are going to help you. A man can lose confidence in women but fortunately, he can also regain it. How to achieve this purpose?
Try to assume your share of responsibility in the sentimental situations that you have previously experienced. Don’t just look at how that person behaved with you. It is important that you also reflect on why you fell in love and chose to have a story with that someone who at the time seemed special to you.
If you test people, then they walk away. When you don’t trust women and meet someone you like, that forethought makes that person feel questioned and judged by you, even if you don’t realize it. You behave as if she has more to prove to you than you have to prove to her. Remember that love is only possible through equality and reciprocity.
When you meet a person, you have doubts about how the future can evolve between you. But that woman also has the same level of unease because she doesn’t know you well enough to have blind faith in your words. Therefore, from now on, try to transcend your own point of view to observe the reality of others from empathy.
It starts with a friendship. Before committing to a relationship, you can take your time to get to know that person from the level of friendship where you can observe their way of being, their behavior, and their values without getting involved on a sentimental level. In that case, live this period calmly since time will give you the security to make decisions.
Falling in love is a constant invitation to get out of your comfort zone. It is incompatible to open your heart to someone and continue in that foreseeable vital framework. Assume that every time you fall in love there is a risk that reality will break your expectations, but there is also the alternative possibility of living a prosperous and happy love. However, if you position yourself in distrust from the beginning, then you increase the risk of falling into the trap of your own self-fulfilling prophecy (what you believe, finally, is fulfilled).
Watch love stories starring other people. Not only through cinema or literature, in real life, but you can also see how the world surprises you with the birth of new crushes. As a human being, you can learn not only from your own experience but also from the experiences of others. If other people fall in love and are reciprocated, why don’t you trust that the same thing can happen to you if you want this to happen in your life?
Remember this message from Emily Dickinson: “All we know about love is that love is all there is.”
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.