Do you feel that no one likes you? Sometimes we make an effort to be liked by others, to be interesting and friendly or nice to make friends or find a partner, and yet it gives us the feeling that nothing works. Why doesn’t anyone like me? Why does everyone seem to find a partner except me? Is no one really interested in me? Will nobody ever like me?
In this Psychology-Online article, we are going to review some of the reasons that lead you to think that no one likes you and what you can improve to change that situation with 11 practical tips to make a boy or girl like you.
Why do I feel like no one likes me?
It is very difficult not to like anyone, as well as how to like everyone. Surely you know people who succeed wherever they go. They have dozens of friends, they always have plans and when they meet someone they like each other from the beginning. Well, even those people don’t like everyone.
There are ways to be more open and social. And people who are like that usually do not strive to please, but they please by being themselves at all times. His way of behaving is socially desirable.
If your case is the opposite and you feel that no one likes you, it may be for 3 reasons:
- You don’t like yourself and you think that no one can like you. Negative self-esteem or a bad self-concept may be the reasons why you feel that no one likes you. Here you will find more information about the types of self-esteem.
- You are going through a depressive disorder that makes you see things in a negative way. One of the characteristic symptoms of depressive disorders is negative bias, that is, that you interpret the intentions or behaviors of others in a negative way. It may be another one for which you feel that no one is attracted to you.
- You have unrealistic expectations. You have to be aware of the difference between your expectations and reality because many times we think that no one likes us because they do not respond in the way we expect and that disappoints us.
It is very possible that there are people who like you, but if you really have indications or evidence that confirm that no one likes you, it is time to analyze your behavior with others, since there are ways of acting that take you away from people.
Why doesn’t anyone like me?
There are people who wonder: why doesn’t anyone like me if I’m handsome or pretty? First of all, it is important to know that the attraction does not depend exclusively on the physique, but that many factors come into play. Furthermore, tastes and perceptions of beauty are personal. Therefore, whether you yourself, in your opinion, may or may not be handsome, has little relation to whether another person may like you or not.
On the other hand, as I mentioned before, it is most likely that many people do like you, which may be that those people who you like you do not like you. So the right question would be: why doesn’t the guy or girl I like me? It can occur for several reasons:
- You may be looking at the wrong person. Sometimes it is not that no one likes you, but that the boys or girls you like do not correspond to you. And it is possible that someone else likes you that you haven’t even noticed. Expand your vision, get closer to people with whom you have things in common.
- They don’t really know you. Many times we are attracted to others just by looking at them and crossing two words, but the only thing that can confirm that you really like a person is knowing them. For the same reason, if the boys or girls don’t get to know you, you won’t know if they like you or not.
- You wait for it to pass without doing anything. You haven’t tried to get close to that boy or girl or talk or conquer in any way. Generally, others do not come to ask us out if they do not sense something of interest on our part.
- You try too hard. When we want to pretend what we are not, we overact, and that drives people away. Be authentic or authentic.
- You reflect little self-love. If you don’t like yourself, you will hardly be able to like others. Work on your self-acceptance. Improve the aspects that you think would help you like confidence and social skills. There is nothing more attractive than a confident person.
How to like someone
Each person is unique. And it is in terms of values, attitude, experiences, tastes, etc. There is so much variety that in my opinion, it is impossible that no one will ever like you. The attraction is something that cannot be planned or forced. It arises when there are people who share values, visions of life, hobbies, behaviors or have qualities that the other person likes.
If you feel really worried or worried about that question, we are going to review some things that can help you to like the person you like: 11 practical tips to like the boy or girl who attracts you.
- Analyze reality objectively. Think about how much truth there is in what you think about others. If necessary, ask the people around you if they perceive the situation in the same way that you perceive it.
- Ask for forgiveness when you’re wrong . Pride drives others away. If you make or have made mistakes, apologize. Acknowledging your mistakes allows you to learn from them. In this article we analyze pride from psychology .
- Be generous or generous . But do not do it thinking of giving and then receiving because then it is not generosity but interest and interested people do not usually like them.
- Be sincere . I do not mean that you say everything you think without filters and without anyone asking you, but that you do not lie.
- Don’t use lies to get what you want. That usually breaks trust and restoring it is very difficult.
- Self-esteem yes, selfishness no . It is one thing that you think of yourself, love yourself and look for your own interests and another that you look for them above the interests of others thinking only of yourself. In this article you will find techniques to work on a healthy self-esteem .
- Beware of criticism. If you constantly criticize third parties when you talk to someone, your interlocutor will think that you do the same with him when you are with another person.
- Sometimes you have to give in . If you hang out with a group and you tend to object to plans you don’t like, they will probably stop calling you. It’s not about always doing what others want, but it’s not about always doing what you like the most. The important thing is actually having a good time with your friends.
- Acceptance. Accept that you can’t like everyone, sometimes someone doesn’t like you, and there’s nothing wrong with you.
- Conversations. If you read and become more informed, your conversations will be more interesting than if you always talk about the same topics.
- Education first . The rude do not like. Be polite by saying hello, saying good morning, giving way, picking up something that was dropped by whoever was next to you, being punctual in your meetings and giving thanks.
- Show interest . Don’t talk about yourself all the time. When they talk to you, practice active listening . Take an interest in what they tell you by asking questions.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.