I have a girlfriend but I like another: what can I do?
You may wonder this and that is why you go to this article, a person can be in a relationship and begin to feel something special for another. In fact, one of the reasons that can drive the break is this point. When someone falls in love with another person, their affective involvement is oriented in that direction and not in the specific bond of the current relationship.
This type of process does not materialize in a day, that is, when someone has a partner but also has feelings for another person, they experience an inner struggle for a time before making a final decision. “I have a girlfriend but I like another: what can I do?” ; If you find yourself in such a situation, in the following Psychology-Online article, we give you ideas to move forward.
How to know if I have fallen in love or wish for another
How can you clarify your feelings in a situation like this?
1. That person occupies a good part of your thoughts
The affective universe is also directly linked to thought. When you like someone, it becomes a regular image in your mind . This process is gradual, that is, it goes from less to more. The memory of that person can come to your mind in the most unexpected way from external stimuli in the daily routine.
2. You are absent
You are physically present, however, your mind evades those sensations that lead you to imagine situations with that person that you identify as special. You recognize these sensations because you have already experienced them before in your life, however, the context in which this new illusion occurs is conditioned with a relationship that is a reality in your life.
This absence corresponds to the protagonist’s emotional involvement in this bond, which results in a change in attitude with respect to the sentimental relationship itself.
3.The answer makes you doubt
If someone asked you if you like that person, perhaps externally you could deny it, however, your inner voice would not say the same. The simple doubt can already make you question what is really happening.
Now that you know if you have fallen in love or want another, it is time to answer this question: I have a girlfriend but I like another: what can I do?
I like another but I have a girlfriend: how to make a decision
In such a situation, the best decision is one that you make individually based on your own criteria. In this type of circumstance, what is truly determining is not only the decision you make but also how you act during the process.
Don’t play with anyone’s feelings
That is to say, an experience of this type should not be an excuse to feed the illusions and play with the expectations of that third person in a little responsible way, when they play with our feelings we feel insecure and our self-esteem decreases.
In turn, this situation should not be a reason to cheat on your partner either . You can take some time to get to know that someone who is special to you from the point of view of friendship better. This time is also necessary so as not to confuse the meaning of this novelty in your life that may be indicating something different to you.
You are in a process of clarifying feelings and your decision about your relationship should not be determined, solely, by what the response of that third person to you is. That is, if you have fallen in love, but you are not reciprocated, that does not change anything in relation to the feelings you have towards your partner.
How to make a final decision
Therefore, the decision to break or continue should not be conditioned by the idea of a new relationship or the infeasibility of that option. Since even if that circumstance does not occur, you may come to the conclusion that you do not want to continue in that story. You are the only person who can discover this response from respect for yourself and your partner.
Sincerity is a value that allows you to approach happiness, simply because it gives you inner peace.
What to do if you decide to continue your relationship
It may happen that your love story is your final choice and you decide to give that bond a new chance, trying to forget that third person. In that case, you can set the goal of feeding the relationship with news and surprises through a higher level of involvement.
If you make this decision, make sure that the reason for your choice is not related to fear of loneliness, attachment to the comfort zone or self-deception. Talk to your partner to express what aspects of change you would like to see exactly in the relationship. In turn, listen openly to what they have to say to you. Remember that improving communication in the couple is a fundamental step.
Break contact with the other person
In order not to feed confusion of any kind, it is recommended that you cut off communication with that third person because their presence will be pleasant for you, however, it will also confuse you. This resignation is part of the decision you have made to bet on your love story.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.