In the realm of imagination, when a person immerses himself in this realm of fantasy, anything is possible. However, reality imposes its limits. And this is observable, too, in love. There are different circumstances why a story can be unviable in the present for the protagonists. Perhaps that person is married and is not willing to leave their partner.
Maybe there is no reciprocal love. Perhaps the enormous distance is an insurmountable barrier for both. Or, maybe someone fell in love with your best friend. How to forget an impossible love? In Psychology-Online we give you the keys so that you know how to forget a love.
What is an impossible love
A story of this type is one whose plot breaks the personal desire of the protagonist. That is, there is a limit that establishes a barrier to the lover’s own will. In this way, when the protagonist observes the viability of this story in the reality of his life, there is no harmony. This emotional experience, an impossible love, has a dramatic tone for those who want to give their love, however, they cannot do it freely.
It is then when becoming aware of the very impossibility of that love, the initial illusion of falling in love becomes a source of frustration, sadness and anger. When a person finds himself in such a story, events do not progress naturally.
When there is an impossible love it is the protagonists who have determined by their own decision that this impossibility remains real. That is, they are not willing to make changes, assuming the consequences, to live this impossible love.
5 reasons to forget an impossible love
Sometimes it happens that when a person is at this point they feel that no reason is strong enough to make the final determination to forget. However, the reasons for forgetting are a source of motivation. Therefore, below we present the 5 main reasons to forget an impossible love , although there may be many more depending on each situation. Which are yours?
1. You deserve to be happy
It is paradoxical, however, while the lover feels that his happiness depends on being reciprocated, staying in that situation for a long time is the cause of true unhappiness. For example, this fact damages your self-esteem.
2. Learn to be present
Living in the present is an attitude of happiness. However, when a person lives an impossible love he is in a constant inner struggle. For example, you are in person in a place, yet your mind revolves around this unsolved chapter. Here we offer you good reasons to stop waiting on love .
When you live a process of this type, you have the opportunity to reflect and extract a deep learning about what happened. For example, you may come to the conclusion that this feeling is insane because it takes you away from your self-love when you put this story before even your own well-being.
4. Value what you have
Placing the point of attention on unrequited love leads you to live focused on the lack of what you would like to achieve but prevents you from enjoying the reasons for gratitude in your existence.
5. Live a reciprocated love
In order for life to flow, find the true love of your partner and make room for this feeling, first of all, you have to close this chapter.
Forgetting an impossible love is not an easy experience, so if you need psychological help, consult the advice of a specialist.
How to forget an impossible love: 8 tips
How to forget an unrequited love? It is not easy to forget love, but then we explain what you can do to turn the page:
1. Remember that it is an impossible love
In a situation of this type, it is common for the lover to have difficulty accepting reality as it is. Therefore, he lives in a constant struggle between reality in itself and the inner story that he tells himself. A story that revolves around what may happen. How to remember that it is an impossible love? Attending to the reality of the facts beyond wishes.
What is the reason why this love can be described as impossible? Identify this aspect and remember it more often.
2. Accept the facts
Yes, sometimes things are not as we would like them to be. Sometimes our wishes are one and our actions are others. How to forget an unrequited love? It is important to stick to reality, observe the facts objectively (or as objectively as possible) and practice full acceptance of reality . It can be complex, as things are usually expected to change and improve, even with objective evidence that they are not. However, it is necessary to accept reality in order to live a real life and not an imaginary one. This article can help you: Accept what we cannot change .
3. Trust the people who love you
When someone lives an impossible and love unrequited, suffers while the closest environment also cares about their welfare. It is likely that you will not find it pleasant to listen to the advice of those people who, as confidants of your story, suggest that you permanently forget.
However, the opinion of those loved ones gives you valuable information about reality since, from their position, they have an external point of view and by not being affectively involved in this situation, they can observe reality more clearly. Talk about it with people you trust.
4. Listen to your feelings
Impossible love can also be reinforced by the filter of idealization . However, it is convenient that you listen to your feelings to become aware that this discomfort that you feel should not be prolonged in an unnecessary way. When you think you are facing someone perfect, when you feel that that person is the only one who can make you happy, connect with the reality of your heart. Observe the wear of feelings that remind you of the pain of this story. Because those feelings are giving you valuable information. This pain does not compensate for an eternal wait.
5. Break the virtual contact
The complexity of love in the era of social networks means that the process of turning the page not only has to occur in reality itself, but also in the digital environment. If you receive constant stimuli of information about the life of that person through their publications, then, this memory leads you to delay forgetting as a desirable goal when you find yourself in this circumstance. How to forget an impossible love? Ensuring that the contact is non-existent.
6. Don’t pretend to be a fortune-teller
Whoever lives an impossible love in the present may look for some light of hope in the future. However, do not hypothesize about what may happen. In the morning there may be different paths, however, the present is the only thing that matters.
How to forget an impossible love? When you feel that your mind is leading you to focus on the future, reconnect with the now through immediate occupation or by focusing on the information you receive through the senses. Focus on the present and your immediate future but giving space to other aspects of your life.
7. Plans to meet new people
When that person occupies a good part of your thoughts, it is recommended that you try to distract yourself and meet new people, in addition to staying with your usual environment. How to forget an impossible love? Living.
8. Letter to an impossible love
This psychological exercise can be very useful in case it is difficult for us to cut the mental thread that still binds us to that person. It is important to point out that this letter should not be written for someone to receive it, but rather to vent and do an exercise in internal dialogue.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.