How does a person act when an infidelity is discovered?

Social relationships are very important in a person’s life. Much of our psychological well-being passes through our social relationships. In these we establish links and specific emotions appear that are intended to protect the relationship created. Sometimes, when the relationship is threatened by a third person, jealousy and jealous behavior can appear. Jealousy is present in many relational situations of the person, such as family, work, school, friendships. Even so, the jealousy that we find the most or are usually more common are those observed in love relationships. In Psychology-Online we will explain how a person acts when they discover infidelity.

Change behavior

We detect a change in attitude in our partner and we cannot relate it to anything, at work, as he said, everything remains the same, in his family everything is going well, among you he says that too. However, you detect that he is not with you as before and despite asking actively and passively the other person ignores the question and deflects the subject.

Hide the mobile

eye! There are people who have always kept their privacy as something sacred, so they never left their cell phone in view of anyone. Even so, if your partner has never had a problem with having his mobile on the table, opening his messages in front of you and even lending it to you, but lately he has been very reticent and reserved with it, it may be that he wants to hide something. Here you will find more information on how to discover infidelity.

Make excuses

Your partner has been very transparent with you and has included you almost always in many plans that he made, but lately you feel that he makes excuses for everything and that he seeks a lot of time with other people but not with you.

Being irascible

One of the typical signs that a person is unfaithful is that they are more susceptible and irritable. The person who is cheating on his partner, due to the tension he maintains so as not to be caught, can be more irascible when he feels that his infidelity may come to light.

Giving too much attention

Another of the typical behaviors of a person when an infidelity is discovered is excessive attention. It may also happen that guilt for infidelity makes the person much more attentive than they were before. Cook that dish that you like so much, take you to dinner at your favorite restaurant, etc.

Avoid conversations

One of the things that people do is avoid talking about what we think may cause us conflict. Surely, you have some suspicion about who may be the person with whom he is cheating on you, perhaps you have tried to snoop a bit on the subject indirectly with your partner, but each time you bring up the subject either he avoids the situation or else he becomes tense and you see that he does not know how to leave the subject.

Show insecurity

There are people who despite having an affair with another person, are terrified of the idea of ‚Äč‚Äčlosing their partner and, fearing that they have discovered or may be discovered, show some insecurity and ask for the constant approval of their partner. couple.

Being distant

Perhaps the couple does not want to face the conversation after knowing that you know that they have a lover, with which they can be much colder to avoid an argument . He takes time in the distance to decide or to face the reality of what happened and the consequences it may have.

Show emotional lability

It can also happen that before the discovery of infidelity, the person presents different states of mind as a result of their confusion. Perhaps there are days when your partner is very close and days when they prefer to have a lot of space. All this may be due to the difficulty in understanding your emotions and what you really want. Here we explain how a cheating person feels .

Not bear the consequences

Since your partner knows that you know his secret, he has not spent a day at home, it seems that he does not care how you are. Well, there are people who when faced with problems have difficulty in facing them and that leads them to behaviors that prevent them from thinking about it . Like going out to party and getting drunk.

Show irritability

The couple may be angry at being discovered and may be irritable as a result of their frustration . Here we explain how to act before an infidelity .


When a person is unfaithful to his partner, it may be that he begins to act inactively in the partner, he conforms to everything. He does not propose new plans and you notice that he does not spend quality time with his partner, he seems distracted and absorbed.

The environment changes its behavior

Perhaps the environment is aware of what is happening, either because the couple has verbalized that they are seeing another person or because they have seen them together, this fact creates a climate of discomfort that can be seen reflected in the attitude they adopt I respect you two.

Not having sexual approaches

All the passion that had been has disappeared, it cannot be associated either with the passage of time and routine, everything has been tried to revive the flame. But lately you notice that he is grooming himself more than usual, that he has different behaviors than he had but they do not seem to be for you, since he continues in the same monotony as always.

Avoid intimacy

It can happen that the person who commits infidelity feels guilty and that leads him to try to avoid intimate moments with you. Although you look for them over and over again, the person rejects those moments and if you sometimes notice a certain tension.

How to discover infidelities?

Despite what many people think, in a moment of confusion I look at his cell phone and I am going to find out, that may be an attack on the privacy of the other, and despite the fact that the other person is being unfaithful to you, his behavior was you are not of much respect, not for that reason you should put yourself at their level. There are other ways to discover infidelities:


It is important to pay attention to our partner and their habitual behavior, observation will allow us to detect when there is something that squeaks us in the relationship.


Use communication so that your partner expresses what I needed to tell you. For this you can give feedback on how you see your relationship today, this will allow the other person if they have any concerns to take it out.

Example. “Lately I notice you more distant, I know that maybe I am too, but that makes me think that maybe we are not well or that something happens between us.”


Take courage, think that you don’t deserve all this, and go directly to ask if there is another person. His reaction, his words and how he acts when asked will make you open your eyes for sure.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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